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Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Top Ten Signs that Harry Potter & Hogwarts is in Malaysia

Everyone knows Harry Potter is from England. But where Hogwarts is located is still a great mystery. Well, I think it’s somewhere in Malaysia. And Harry Potter is actually Malaysian. Here’s ten reasons why.

Top Ten Signs that Harry Potter & Hogwarts is in Malaysia by Simon (who used to be an acolyte in the Dark Arts):

  • Only KTM can come out with something like Platform 9 ¾.

  • Tortured house elves. Abused foreign maids. See the connection?!

  • School kids spend more time eating junk food and pulling pranks rather than studying.

  • Schoolbooks and supplies are so expensive we need gold galleon to buy them. Same in Malaysia.

  • Hand phones have no signal there (as mentioned in Book 5).

  • Don’t the Hogwarts houses like Gryffindor & Slytherin remind you of your rumah sukan during your school sports day?

  • Headmaster is a near-senile old man that doesn’t do anything until the sh!t has hit the fan.

  • Nobody understands what the teachers are going on about during class.

  • The Minister of Magic… well, I think I should know better…

  • Expecto Petronas!’. Enough said.

Back to main page.


  • Never bother to really watch HP nor read the books. But still this is funny. Heck, what is 'acolytein'? I need a dictionary to read your site.

    By Blogger 5xmom, at 7/12/2005 04:48:00 pm  

  • This is extremely GOOD!!! I love this post. You are so right, on ALL OF THEM!

    By Blogger Lazy Bone, at 7/12/2005 04:57:00 pm  

  • Ha ha funny!!!

    By Blogger cheayee, at 7/12/2005 05:08:00 pm  

  • 5xmom - sorry, corrected the mistake...

    cheayee & lazybones - the HP fanboys will be spamming me soon...

    By Blogger Simon, at 7/12/2005 05:28:00 pm  

  • I'm a Harry Pothead fan and this is a farking good post. Looking at the main characters, McGonagall is the "Lou Ku Por" Discipline teacher and their quidditch pitch looks like our skool padang, Draco Malfoy is the anak datuk school bully with his two phat and dumb sidekicks ... and I can go on an on

    By Blogger Jojo Low, at 7/12/2005 05:32:00 pm  

  • -.-"

    Anyone gonna start filming a Malaysian spoof then? Bet it'll be a big hit online and if done properly, might get hired by the producers later to help them. :P


    By Blogger dannyFoo, at 7/12/2005 05:35:00 pm  

  • haha..slytherin beats 'mallory' anytime.

    dannyfoo, where got budget to make that kind of movie? no ones gonna sponsor a fantasy movie by a malaysian director let alone a spoff movie. unless of course every malaysian movie goer donates RM1. then that might be enough...

    By Blogger yuin, at 7/12/2005 07:22:00 pm  

  • Oh no...not another top 10 post...I'm actually getting into it too...seems that we have something in common...

    By Blogger howsy, at 7/12/2005 07:28:00 pm  

  • ROFLMAO!!!

    By Blogger vivian, at 7/13/2005 01:32:00 am  

  • Simon, I just posted your link to a HP hardcore fan you know...

    By Blogger Jason, at 7/13/2005 01:43:00 am  

  • momo jojo - my discipline teacher also like mcgonagall. Very old.

    howsy - my mom also ipoh-lang!

    yuin & dannyfoo - if every m'sian donates RM1, we'll have a very big budget!

    vivian - :)

    jason - Er... malaysian or not?

    By Blogger Simon, at 7/13/2005 08:37:00 am  

  • bwahahahaha! the 'anak datuk' is a real home run ;)

    By Blogger Belacan, at 7/13/2005 11:25:00 am  

  • I'm a HP fan, but this is funny.

    Looks like you've been having the books very thoroughly.

    By Blogger sexymama, at 7/13/2005 12:03:00 pm  

  • belacan - or in this case, anak "death eater"!

    sexymama - actually i have only read each book once... and the last book i read more than 3 years ago...

    By Blogger Simon, at 7/13/2005 02:08:00 pm  

  • LMAO!! Nice post!! Nice post!!! Simon u should submit ur jokes to local newspaper to earn extra money, or submit it to Readers' Digest. XD

    By Blogger CLF, at 7/13/2005 03:13:00 pm  

  • The Malaysian HP version is called "Hairi Pontianak". :P

    By Blogger Mei, at 7/13/2005 04:49:00 pm  

  • clf - kementerian dalam negeri will never let that happen!

    mei - Hairi pontianak? That's will never get past the censors! :)

    By Blogger Simon, at 7/13/2005 09:29:00 pm  

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