How To Put On 10kg During Chinese New Year (And Fall Sick After That)

How To Put On 10kg During Chinese New Year (And Fall Sick After That)

• Doesn’t BBQ meat taste great? Just repeat to yourself, “Once in awhile only, and I worked hard to deserve this…”





• Eat lots and lots of mandarin oranges. And don’t bother to peel off all the white strands of skin.





• Eat, sleep, PS2. Eat, sleep, PS2. Eat, sleep, PS2. Repeat ad infinitum. Make sure your mom comes in once a day to water you and turn you towards the window.





• Nobody’s eating all the keropok and cookies on the table, such a pity to see it go to waste…





• Don’t drink water, even if it’s 40 degrees Celsius outside. Just load up on Coke and Orange crush. With lots of ice.





• Who needs sleep when you have tons of TV shows and downloads and DVDs to watch? It’s not like you have to wake up before 12 noon to go to work, or anything?





• Use the phrase as your mantra – “I’ll work it off after the holidays” and you’ll have a great guilt-free binge.





• Seven words –Chinese New Year open house free food. That veritable time honoured Malaysian tradition. Who cares which bigshot politician is hosting it, as long as there is food…





• Firecracker fumes can be SO addictive…





• Set back your bathroom weighing machine about 10kg and your all set for a great holiday.