Cringe Questions I Dislike Being Asked

Here are some questions that really annoy or get on my nerves. I call them cringe-question, because every time I hear them, it makes me squirm like hearing fingernails on the blackboard. Most of the time I refuse to answer, and the rare few times I answer, you’ll probably would not like my answer.

1. When are getting married / Still not married aah?
The ultimate cringe-question. I am already married, but I really cringe whenever I hear someone asked this one. Let’s get this straight, for those unclear of the concept: If someone does not have a boyfriend or girlfriend, they’re probably looking for one. If they have one already, they are probably not ready to get married or are saving money for it. If someone is over a certain age, they probably resigned not to married. NONE, I repeat, NONE of the people mentioned above like answering this question.

2. This year your company got bonus or not?
No comment. I just dislike this question.

3. Simple thing also you don’t know, aah?
The person asking is trying to show he’s smarter than you, or patronizing you like a small child. A much cruder version would be: “Why, your parents never teach you one aah?”

4. Wah, you can read Chinese aah?
Granted, my Mandarin and dialects are not that great, but I’ll survive in Taiwan/HK/mainland China anyday. Does my face scream out “English educated!” that make people ask me this question? Maybe they think everybody’s stereotypical, English-schooled guys are all banana-people and Chinese-educated guys cannot pronounce their R’s. And all Sarawakians are filthy rich Foochows. No, wait, that's true.

5. Why you so fat / thin / short / tall / dark / fair one aah? (or other physical attribute)
This is assuming the person asking the question has perfect physical attributes, looks like Kristin Kreuk’s twin sister. Or thinks he or she has. Heck, I bet even Kristin Kreuk doesn’t ask that question!!!

6. No need to work aah?
Picture this office scene. You’re overworked and stressed, you haven’t had a day off in 2months. It’s 8pm and your exhausted, so you take a 2 minute break to clear your mind. You mention a funny incident with your colleague as friends do. The bitchy, annoying boss’s PA walks past (with her nose pointed up) and snorts, “No need to work, aah?”

7. “When’s your third one coming?”
I get asked this all the time. I have 2 children, so naturally, they expect another one. If I’m really annoyed, I ask them back question one above.