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Friday, March 30, 2007

Job Application Letter. And A Very Good One At It.

Attn.: The HR Manager,

Dear Sir / Madam,

Application for Post Of XXXXX

I refer to your full page ad in the newspaper ad today, which probably cost a whole lot of money, from which i deduced that you guys are rich and can pay me a lot to do less than my current job. Well, okay, my current job isn't all that bad, but i screwed up something and would rather leave before more people find out about that fiasco. My company is very good at 'pointing fingers', or whatever cool new management buzzword they use to call it. You know my company, your direct competitor, which i will gladly bring all their secrets with me to your company. The address of my company is clearly printed on the envelope containing this letter.

Anyways, please call me for an interview, i haven't worn my clean shoes and tie for awhile, since my last interview, in fact.

Attached is my resume, feel free to read it. Let me tell you first i can't remember half of the stuff there, it's been awhile, i tell ya. In fact i'm not sure if i actually DID most of those stuff, after such a long time, the line between white lies of a padded resume and reality blurs together. Anyway, let's just assume i did all those stuff and know all that i say i know, 'k?

Please also keep the interview short - 10 minutes max. I can only lie and keep a straight face that long before i... well, anyway.

Call me. Let's do lunch.

Regards,
Job Applicant.

But seriously folks, read this to better prepare yourself for all those killer interview questions.

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